He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
