Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
This is the prime rib incident all over again
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Randomize
