I'm drive I can fine osifer
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Randomize
