Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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