Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
This is classic penis vs brain.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
