You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
