this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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