i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
