i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
