Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.

(405): View more from Oklahoma

And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.

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(405): The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it. (405): And before you ask they are unrelated purchases. http://tfl.nu/nz1r

Replies (14) Good night (2713) Bad night (513)
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(413): View more from Massachusetts

Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning

(1-413): View more from Massachusetts

More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub

(413): View more from Massachusetts

I wish i could be there for it

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(413): Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning (1-413): More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub (413): I wish i could be there for it http://tfl.nu/f5kk

Replies (4) Good night (2374) Bad night (524)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.

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(412): I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers. http://tfl.nu/htrv

Replies (38) Good night (840) Bad night (2194)
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(914): View more from New York

Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.

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(914): Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart. http://tfl.nu/xtrr

Replies (13) Good night (3503) Bad night (985)
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(973): View more from New Jersey

how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.

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(973): how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me. http://tfl.nu/ql7e

Replies (19) Good night (4365) Bad night (2032)
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(905): View more from Ontario

I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.

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(905): I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation. http://tfl.nu/5c1o

Replies (21) Good night (1177) Bad night (4172)
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(703): View more from Virginia

He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.

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(703): He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days. http://tfl.nu/iucs

Replies (16) Good night (1665) Bad night (5668)
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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"

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(403): Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters" http://tfl.nu/r2rb

Replies (6) Good night (2553) Bad night (1316)
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(931): View more from Tennessee

How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.

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(931): How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you. http://tfl.nu/giys

Replies (7) Good night (3326) Bad night (1152)
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(708): View more from Illinois

Less talking, more tequila

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(708): Less talking, more tequila http://tfl.nu/d67d

Replies (8) Good night (2304) Bad night (664)
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(414): View more from Wisconsin

Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.

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(414): Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom. http://tfl.nu/gfee

Replies (6) Good night (759) Bad night (1681)
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(905): View more from Ontario

Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.

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(905): Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights. http://tfl.nu/cnu2

Replies (4) Good night (2361) Bad night (822)
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(913): View more from Kansas

I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen

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(913): I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen http://tfl.nu/cr8z

Replies (5) Good night (1848) Bad night (607)
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(254): View more from Texas

GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT

(254): View more from Texas

^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.

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(254): GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT (254): ^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out. http://tfl.nu/79e1

Replies (0) Good night (608) Bad night (264)
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(615): View more from Tennessee

I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...

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(615): I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own... http://tfl.nu/6vth

Replies (2) Good night (550) Bad night (306)

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