hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
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