It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
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sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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