it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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