walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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