Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
