the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Randomize
