I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
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