Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
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