i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
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I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
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I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
i think im in europe. pls send help
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
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