try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
