Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(575): View more from New Mexico

This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.

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(530): View more from California

it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.

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(765): View more from Indiana

You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house

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