You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Randomize
