Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
not ubering you a puppy
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Randomize
