I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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