There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
