My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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