I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
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