I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize
