Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
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