its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
