Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
