New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
