That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize