Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize
