Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Randomize
