there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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