Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
