Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
North Korea, Best Korea!
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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