who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Randomize
