Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize
