I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
