i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
