he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Sext me about skeletons
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Randomize