My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
