Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Randomize
