I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Randomize
