According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize
