at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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