its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
