It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Randomize
